untitled

I am currently decluttering my RedBubble Portfolio, to make way for more recent art that best represents who I am now, as well as to make it easier for customers to navigate the available products for sale. As a result I will be sharing some of my old creative writings here on WordPress, as a way of preserving them. In several cases my mind, opinions, beliefs, values and overall understanding of life have changed since the time I wrote these pieces, but I still feel that they are personally valuable reminders of the various stages of my life journey thus far.

This piece of writing was first posted at my RedBubble Creative Writing Portfolio.

Date of original post: 27 June 2011

Total views, at 2 May 2016: 286

 

untitled (lifted from my journal)

Be merciful, I beg you
You know that I am dust
and broken soul fragments
bound together by a fragile spirit
floundering my way through a finite world
scarred and damaged beyond reason

And I know that you’re out there, too
and that you hear me
Though I wonder whether you care,
if I mean anything to you at all

So I borrow the words and platitudes
the songs composed by others
hoping their charitable act of forming and sharing their cliched words and setting them to tired chords
could somehow convey to you what’s happening in my heart

And those little moments in the music
those emotive notes and timed pauses
are somehow meant to suffice
as a way for me to tell you how I feel
to let my spirit speak

It’s not enough anymore
they aren’t my words.
Sure, they bridge the gap between us for a moment
but then what?
The moment passes
it was all just borrowed praise
but it disintegrates into meaningless noise and clamour

The pretty faced girls are meant to sing these things to you
I’m not that
not enough
never enough
never good enough

I want to be good enough
I want the words to be my own
but I don’t know where to begin

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